Tuesday 28 November 2017

Movie review of Justice League

Justice League - 5/10

They(Warner Bros) never seem to learn from their mistakes. Its not just only the same problems they had with Batman vs Superman, this time they got a whole new set of problems as well. One thing is for sure, WB just doesn't give a rat's ass about continuity. The number of obvious mistakes between BvS and JL is astounding. here's one. Why the fuck do you need to edit your film to a shorter time and then release the director's cut for. Cutting out at least 40 mins of footage is silly. There are bound to be obvious jump cuts and it disrupts the flow of the movie. There were a few times, I went "What the fuck is going on?" throughout the movie and some questionable scenes that made me go "Did that "really happen or When the fuck did that happen?'

And what's up with the special effects lah? Why the CGI until like that? The CGI villain, Steppenwolf reminded me of Beowulf the animated movie. I have no idea who he is. The only Steppenwolf, I know is the dude who sang, "Born to be wild" and I got that song from a movie with a gorilla who escapes the zoo with a teenager. Go figure.

When everyone had a hard time beating him but Superman comes in and punches the shit out him. Wow. Before I get into Superman, Steppenwolf's story was also explained a little too briefly and the whole thing with the mother boxes is confusing.

Superman. At the end of BvS, there is earth moving on his coffin which would surely mean he is coming back to life cos of the sun and all. But that suddenly changed into putting a mother box into that Luthor's alien ship and bringing him back to life. WHY? And then there was that ridiculous removal of his moustache using CGI which made him look abit like Stan from American Dad.

Batman. I felt Affleck did a decent job portraying as Batman in BvS. His Batman voice was more audible instead of Bale's death metal growl. Bruce Wayne was supposed to be old in this. Perhaps they should have made Affleck a little more older which would have been cooler. I also liked the fact that Danny Elfman did a little tribute by putting the old Batman theme and Superman theme in the music subtly.

Wonderwoman. Gal Gadot was good. Her stand alone movie was fantastic and her theme song kicked ass. This I'm not too sure but the sword she wields... wasn't that destroyed earlier?

Cyborg. I don't really know much about the comic character nor the actor, Ray Fisher but I would say he did a pretty decent job. What I loved more was his father who had an awesome death scene in Terminator 2(Dr. Miles Dyson). There was a scene where a bad guy(I can't remember what the fuck they were called) creeps up behind him and that really reminded me of T2.

Flash. His suit looked like a skinnier and white version of Shaquille O'Neal's superhero movie, Steel. But he is still way more better and funnier than the TV series Flash. That fucker was annoying and whiny.

Aquaman. Jason Momoa. That is one hot, good looking Hawaiian. Even though in some scenes he was confused as I was and I couldn't really hear what the fuck he was talking about. He may have totally fucked up the remake of Conan but I will still look forward to his stand alone movie.


All in all, Justice League was abit of a letdown due to horrible CGI and shit editing. I suggest just wait for the director's cut and watch it on a weekday. Not worth the weekend price ticket.

Sunday 20 August 2017

Movie review of The Hitman's Bodyguard

The Hitman's Bodyguard - 5.5/10
If you feel like watching a movie without over thinking or you don't want to concentrate on the script and acting and what not. Plus if you are a fan of Samuel L Jackson's movies, then this movie is for you.
Mindless entertainment. Good action sequences and fight choreography. And shit loads of vulgarity.

The cast is pretty good. You got Ryan Reynolds and Sam Jackson doing the buddy thing. They got chemistry and there are some damn funny scenes and lines between them. Reynolds has that exasperated look which serves him well when he is against the always angry Jackson. Gary Oldman is always solid as a bad guy even though he had some weird make up on(which was fine until the close ups). I wished Salma Hayek had more scenes though. That beautiful woman is still smoking hot and  doesn't seem to age one bit. Elodie Yung wasn't good. Electra can't seem to act and appears stiff at times.

The plot is absolute shit and the script is pretty much a "best of Samuel L Jackson's classic one liners". You can spot lines from Die Hard 3 to Pulp Fiction. And the way the word "Motherfucker" rolls out of Sam Jackson's tongue, it's just too cool yet you can feel the hate. And I love saying "Motherfucker" in Sam Jackson's style.


If you can get pass the ridiculous story line, you will enjoy the Hitman's Bodyguard. Just watch it n a weekday.

Wednesday 16 August 2017

Movie review of War for the Planet of the Apes

War for the Planet of the Apes - 6/10


It took me quite awhile to catch this movie even though I really wanted to watch this when I saw the trailer. In a way, I'm kinda glad I didn't watch it on a weekend when it just came out cause the movie wasn't really what I expected and I was a little disappointed with it. Somehow War just felt incomplete. I'm not sure if there is going to be a fourth movie but if there is, I have a funny feeling it's gonna go downhill from here.
Dawn and Rise had fantastic story lines and also a pretty good cast. In fact War has a good cast as well. You have Woody Harrelson who could have been a great and memorable villain but unfortunately he was severely under used. There were so little scenes of him and his last scene was disappointing. Andy Serkis as always was remarkable and such a joy to watch him but this time Caesar was more subdued, maybe it was the age thing and all, I guess. But I still felt something about War's story line that was lacking. I certainly don't feel the need to watch this movie again even if it were to show on cable.
The virus thing that used to kill humans in the previous movies is a bit more docile now and just makes the humans dumb and stupid literally. If I remember correctly from the original movie, the humans were something like that. I may be wrong, it's been a while since I watched that Charlton Heston movie. At least that plot was understandable. What about the avalanche that came out of nowhere like Randy Orton and pretty much killed the rest of the other army and were they infected? Sadly that wasn't explained. And then you have the ending which kinda pissed me off. I know that Caesar has to die and he has to die in a dramatic way but come on lah. Making him die like as though the fella is fucking Moses? Fuck that. I really hate it when they fuse movies with religion, it fucking irks me.

If you haven't watch this, just wait for it on cable. Don't waste your money.

Thursday 22 June 2017

Movie review of Transformers: The Last Knight

Transformers: The Last Knight : 1/10

I went into the cinema knowing full well it's gonna be a shit movie solely because its Michael Bay and all of the Transformers movies were shit. This guy is like Midas, except everything he touches turns to shit instead of gold. For 2 hours and 40 mins, I was dumbfounded. Dumbfounded because I knew it was going to be a shit movie and yet Bay has somehow still managed to piss me off with this horrible piece of crap. I'm going to go in point form and I don't really give a shit about spoilers cause the whole fuck movie is spoilt anyway and it's a Michael Bay movie not a PT Anderson movie so fuck off.

  • Editing. Absolute garbage. I have no fucking idea what the fuck is going on throughout the movie. One scene you are here and then suddenly without explanation you are there and the cuts are so abrupt.
  • Script. Here's an example. "Optimus Prime: [Morse code] I'm coming for you, humans..." IN FUCKING MORSE CODE!!!! And the lines gets worse for the fucking humans.
  • Optimus Prime. I thought the fucker died or looking for something in the previous movie. He finds cybertron which is controlled by some lanjiao bitch transformer leader called Quintessa. She mind fucks him till his eyes turn purple which means he is bad now. Then you don't see that fucker for 30 mins or more in the movie and suddenly he appears and takes Merlin's staff. YEA... FUCKING MERLIN....KING FUCKING ARTHUR'S MERLIN!
  • Optimus Prime's lines. Half the fuck time he is asking everyone what's his motherfucking name like as though he is Snoop Dogg and just to make sure, he will mention his name about 5000 times. even when he is bad, he gives himself a new name. Nemesis Prime. KNN. How about Pukimak Prime, motherfucker.
  • Megatron. It's just lazy that you have to use Starscream's helmet design and say that's a new Megatron look. Frank Welker did the VO for Megatron this time instead of Hugo Weaving which is cool but not very menacing.
  • Decepticons. I don't know why you have to show a range of decepticons with name tags only to kill them off in the next few mins. Definitely done for Hasbro to milk idiots into buying the toys for sure.
  • Timeline. There is no fucking link if you combine all the  Transformers movies together. and then in the Last Knight, all of a sudden you have King fucking Arthur and the knights of the round table and fucking Merlin(FUCK YOU STANLEY TUCCI) carrying a Transformer staff that wields a fucking three headed transformer dragon. Then all of a sudden you have WORLD WAR 2 sequences as well. Hitler was killed by a Transformer clock. Yup. A fucking Transformer clock.
  • Sir Anthony Hopkins. From Remains of the day to Silence of the lambs to Transformers. Why??? You got no money ah cheebye? Getting senile ah? For fuck's sake....
  • Mark Wahlberg aka Marky Mark and his bewildered "Why the fuck am I doing this for a second time" look.
  • British chick. Her forehead like Wong Fei Hong.
  • Special effects were good but utterly useless. you rarely see the transformations.
  • Bumble bee. now he can join his parts like Ironman. and suddenly... he has a voice that pretty much says "I love you Optimus, I will suck your cock and I will die for you" Well along those lines anyway.
  • Hot Rod aka Rodimus Prime is French. WHY???? What's next? Soundwave with an Indian accent?
  • Autobots. Fuck them and their VO actors. By the way you will only see the useless Grimlock in the junkyard. That's all cause the the other Autobots left the fucker there.
  • Little dinobots. I don't know what else to call them but I wonder, did Grimlock fuck Marky Mark to get those fucking babies?
All in all, this is definitely going into the list of worst movies of 2017. If you wanna bring your kids to watch this, for mindless fun. Don't. Teach them Maths or some shit. Fuck this movie.

Movie review of The Mummy

The Mummy - 5.5/10

This is quite possibly one of the very rare occasions, that a Tom Cruise movie did not meet my expectations. Usually any movies lead by Tom Cruise would have been fun to watch and with spectacular action sequences(especially his later movies). The mummy however was a little boring and only some of the action sequences were fun to watch. Script wasn't good and definitely didn't help by mediocre acting by the lead actress, Annabelle Walis whom some of you might have seen her in the TV series, Peaky Blinders. Very dull and stale acting, even her jokes fell flat. The main villain, Ahmanet portrayed by Sofia Boutella bored me as well. I don't know why people say she is hot or something. You know which actresses were hot, funny and can act? The ladies from the Brendan Fraser's Mummy. Now that was a decent and fun movie to watch.(The sequels were shit though) The worst was Russell Crowe. It was clear, he doesn't belong there. A really bad casting for Dr Jekyll.
Sadly this is the first movie for the monsters filled Dark Universe which Universal studios has invested in. Some how or rather, I don't really see this franchise being a hit even though I love monster movies.

Don't bother watching in the cinema. Just wait for cable.

Wednesday 31 May 2017

Movie review of King Arthur: Legend of the Sword

King Arthur: Legend of the Sword - 5/10
All British cast and directed by Guy Ritchie. Should have been great but sadly it isn't. Guy Ritchie movies are very inconsistent. You have really good ones with fantastic script. You have some really shit ones, some with a shit script as well. And you have some that were "meh" and forgettable. Sadly his last movie falls into that category. 
Cast was a little weird for me. Jude Law was fantastic and he does portray a really good villain. Charlie Hunham on the other hand was OK but he had a really hard time with the accent. I really thought he was american putting on a fake English accent but it turns out, he was born in Newcastle, England, I remember watching his earlier movies like Green street hooligan which was a fantastic movie and he didn't have a problem with the English accent. In King Arthur however, it was terrible.
I hated the script and Guy Ritchie did the same trademark sequence which he does for most of his movies. I really didn't feel for the slang of today to be used during the timeline for King Arthur. It was just too off and not funny at all.

The only scene which made me laugh so hard was the cameo appearance by Beckham. From how he looks to how he speaks, it was just too funny and it will forever be made fun of.

All in all, King Arthur is a forgettable movie and not worth watching on a weekend. Just wait for cable.

Movie review of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 - 8/10


Even though it is not as good as the first one, Vol.2 was still fantastic and really fun to watch. There are lots of good positive moments and some really funny ones as well. To me, Drax the destroyer played by WWE legend, Dave Bautista absolutely stole the show. He was damn funny in every scene he was in and I couldn't stop laughing at the "Mantis! LOOK OUT!" part. The rest of the cast were good especially Yondu played by Michael Rooker. The whole anti hero/ father figure suited him really well. You also have the cute factor for the kids with Baby Groot. Which was nice but a little too much of something can be quite annoying.
Direction for Vol.2 was pretty good. I loved the editing and I enjoyed the script. The soundtrack didn't really caught my attention the first time like how it was in the first movie but when I listened to the soundtrack for the second time, that's when I appreciated it.
I will definitely get the Blu ray for this movie and I am looking forward to the third movie and the one where they meet the avengers to face Thanos.

Wednesday 10 May 2017

Movie review of Alien:Covenant

Alien:Covenant - 7.5/10

Few things to take note before watching Alien: Covenant. If you are not a fan of the Alien franchise or science fiction, don't bother watching this. If you are a fan, you need to watch Prometheus first AND most importantly the prologues which are on YouTube. It will help explain. That being said, I enjoyed watching Alien: Covenant despite a few hiccups.
Here are the hiccups.
Editing. Sadly a lot of unexplained stuff and you are bound to go what the fuck happened to that guy? Wasn't he in the trailer? Stuff that appeared in the trailer didn't make it in the movie and that always pisses me off. Then you show those scenes for fuck? Quite a number of pivotal scenes have been cut off hence the kind of abrupt start. My guess why it was edited like that, which is hiccup no. 2.
Timing. Covenant is at 2 hours long when it should be actually 3 hours. The prologues are very important and I didn't realize that they were not in the movie when they should have. I hope there is  a director's cut when the Blu ray comes out and add the prologues and whatever deleted scenes that were cut from the original movie so I can enjoy the movie in its whole.
Script. Very inconsistent. There are some really fucking awesome lines and then there are some Schwarzenegger-esque lines. That music selection line... Fucking awesome. That bed bug line... Fucking cheesy.
Acting is not too shabby. Fassbender pretty much owned every scene he was in. Even though there are some instances I feel he doesn't really act like how he was supposed to especially towards the end but I have a funny feeling that all this will be explained in the next Alien movie as it edges closer to the Alien and Aliens movie.
Effects and the aliens. Still a little unsure on how the first ones come about but design wise it was very meh to me. Facehuggers still creep the shit out of me even though I know whats gonna happen when you look at the fucking cocoon when it opens. The xenomorph was cool as fuck and follows the first Alien design. But there's a scene which involves putting your hands up. I didnt know whether to laugh or facepalm myself.

All in all, its still worth watching on a weekend, if you are a fan of the franchise. I would definitely watch this again and get the Blu ray for the director's cut. But remember to watch the prologues first.

Tuesday 18 April 2017

Movie review of Fate of the Furious

Fate of the Furious - 6/10


The gang is back. This time without Paul Walker of course. And at the rate its going, three's gonna be more installations of the Fast and Furious series. Perhaps less fast and more furious. Why less fast? Because unlike its predecessors, FF8 isn't really about the cars or the racing no more. Its more action now. The action sequences are fun to watch, even though they are down right silly but some how it just isn't the same without a race. There was a race at the start of the film but that was done in such a rush, probably just to get it out of the way and go straight to the action and explosions.

Casting was alright. Charlize Theron can be a good villain. Surprised to see some cameos especially Helen Mirren. I really feel they should give more screen time to Tyrese Gibson and Ludacris, cause these two have god chemistry for comedy. Michelle Rodriguez still can't act but that's OK. Her sad crying scene was laughable. Vin Diesel unfortunately got abit too boring for me. it feels like he is got lazy. its the same old deliverance of speeches and that shit about family has gone really stale for me. The guys who stole the scenes for me are Dwayne Johnson and Jason Statham. All the scenes they were in were awesome. Dwayne pretty much delivered his lines like he was the Rock in WWE. I don't really think he will be returning to the FF franchise because of the beef he has with Vin Diesel which hasn't been solved apparently. I didn't really give two shits either.
Jason did his scenes pretty much how he does in all of his movies. The plane sequence was all him.

Scenes with the submarine are entertaining and quite exciting even though its stupid. Then there is that family shit again in the last scene where Dom waits until the very end to reveal his son's first name which any idiot could have guessed it.

Overall, if you are a fan of the series, you're gonna enjoy it but watching it on a weekday is fine. Those who aren't, just wait for it to be on cable.

Tuesday 14 March 2017

Movie review of Kong:Skull island

Kong:Skull island - 6.5/10


This was a surprisingly enjoyable movie. I loved how they made Kong look like he is one pissed off, battle hardened, lonely motherfucker. All the scenes he was in were brilliant, from start to end. And the fight scenes were exciting and edge of your seat kind of shit.

Mad props to the special effects and CGI team, they did a fantastic job. Jordan Vogt-Roberts is the director for Kong. I have not seen any of his works before but from what I checked, this is probably his biggest budget movie. Pretty good effort for Jordan Vogt-Roberts directing his first ever big budget movie. The editing was quite bad, there were some pretty obvious bad cuts.

Quite a star studded cast. Samuel L Jackson is always awesome playing a bad guy and I hope to see him in more bad guy roles. Tom Hiddleston was decent but the guy who stole the show for me was the ever versatile and funny actor, John C. Reilly. Despite a really shitty script, he managed to pull it off and made me laugh. I cant really say much for Brie Larson, cos there were not a lot of scenes of her acting. In fact there were more shots of her smiling than acting. Brie has a pleasant, genuine smile unlike Emma Stone whose smile makes her look like she is going to bite your fucking face off any moment. The rest of the cast were shit. Jason Mitchell and Corey Hawkins (aka Easy E and Dr Dre from Straight outta Compton) were totally let down by bad acting and an unfunny script.

Still not as bad as the MOST USELESS thing in Skull island, China actress, Jing Tian. I have no idea why the fuck is she in this movie and what she was supposed to be doing. You are in an island, everyone is looking like shit but you are looking like Pierce fucking Brosnan as James Bond. Make up still on, no sweat, hair not disheveled. That was pretty much Jing Tian's role. Even her lines were useless. "THEY TOLD US TO LEAVE AT DAWN. ITS DAWN" 
Knn what kind of fuckall line was that?

Despite the shit script and bad acting, Kong Skull island is still fun to watch especially if you are a fan of King Kong or monster movies. Worth watching on a weekend.

There is an end credit scene and its a good one.

Movie review of Logan

Logan - 7/10


James Mangold who directed this did a pretty good job. He made a gritty, more realistic super hero movie with not much CGI. To me, of all the X men movies, this is definitely one of the best. Because it's violent and rated R and we got to see a proper wolverine and proper wolverine kill scenes. Not that pussy ass shit we had in the early X men movies. His stand alone movies were all shit and the worst one was the X men movie directed by Brett Ratner.

I really liked the make up done for Logan. That battered up look, wolverine had and it kept getting worse through the course of the movie. Caliban's make up and costume was cool as well and I could barely recognize Stephen Merchant.

Acting was pretty decent especially Patrick Stewart who lost quite abit of weight for this and Dafne Keen. I'm not a big fan of Hugh Jackman but he did good for this. I may not have totally felt the final scene as much as everyone else. That scene to me could have done abit more with better acting, script and emotion. Still, Jackman did good for it, he's not a fantastic actor but I will give it for this.
That scene where she turns a cross to an X. That was a nice touch.

Worth watching on a weekend. Logan is a fitting end of an era for Hugh Jackman's Wolverine.

PS - There is no end credit scene, so you dont have to wait.

Friday 3 February 2017

Movie review of Arrival

Arrival - 5.5/10


I was about to give this movie a miss when I saw one of the tag lines and it said Arrival had a shocking ending. Naturally that got me curious and I decided to watch it.

Arrival turned out fine but the ending wasn't as shocking as I would have thought. Still its a decent movie and worth a watch in the cinema.

The good things about Arrival are sound design and also the alien designs as well. They do look mysterious and especially the way they communicate adds more mystique to them. Even the spaceship design may look minimal and all but something about it made me feel, shit might get rough if you fuck with these guys. And I really loved that.

One of my favourite scenes is how the humans get into the spaceship. That was done brilliantly. I enjoyed the plot a lot, showing how humans when panicked or scared about shit they cant comprehend, they turn to be complete arseholes. Sad but very true.

Directed by Denis Villeneuve whose previous works like Prisoners, Enemy and my personal favorite, Sicario. I really like what he has done so far and I am definitely looking forward to his upcoming projects like Blade runner 2049 and possibly Dune.

What I didn't like about Arrival is the choice of the main cast. I like Jeremy Renner but in Arrival, he looked as if he is going to take out his arrows and shoot shit anytime. The worst is Amy Adams. Throughout the movie, she gives that look which is a cross between being oblivious and about to cry, adding that with a voice that sounds like a whimpering whisper. So basically she "Louis Lane"d the shit out of this role. I wont be surprised to see "Louis Lane" in more movies of her.

As for the so called "shocking " ending, it really didn't give me a "what the fuck" feel at all. it was more like a "meh" kind of ending.


Still all in all, Arrival is an interesting movie to watch and Science fiction fans would enjoy this. Just watch it on a weekday.

Movie review of War on everyone

War on everyone - 6/10


I watched this movie just because of Michael Pena. To me, he stole every scene he was in Antman. And in War on Everyone, he pretty much did the same. This time however he has a partner in crime with him and that's Alexander Skarsgard. I have to admit, they are two unlikely actors to act together but they have good chemistry and that's what saves this movie.

The script is good even though somehow it feels like a pirated version of Shane Black's The Nice Guys but there are still some funny lines and well delivered by the actors. Even the supporting cast did a good job and were funny as well. And I could barely recognize Paul Reiser of Mad about you fame as the police chief. Dude is pretty old now.

Written and directed by John Michael McDonagh whose earlier movies I have not had the chance to catch but looking at his filmography, it is a good start.

Overall, War on everyone is a fun movie to watch. Nothing fantastic or even memorable, just fun to watch. maybe catching it on cable would suffice.

Monday 16 January 2017

Movie review of Underworld: Blood wars


Underworld: Blood wars - 3/10

This movie shouldn't have been made in the first place. Absolute shit. There is nothing in this movie that is remotely as good as the first three movies at least. The only good thing about Underworld is that Kate Beckinsale still looks great in leather and that's all.

The whole plot is so boring and predictable. Vampires are stubborn twats and werewolves are idiots. And the explanation of Mr half vampire half werewolf who is the father to Selena's weird child aka Scott's disappearance was just plain lazy.

Then you have a vampire clan who are in some place that is covered in snow and if you sort of learn their special move or join their clan, you get to have blonde hair or in Selena's case, blonde streaks in her hair. Of course she couldn't go fully blonde because she is a goth kind of vampire. Knn. Fuck this shit.


Don't bother with Underworld Blood wars if you don't want to ruin your day.

Friday 6 January 2017

Movie review of The Girl with all the gifts

The girl with all the gifts - 7.5/10

I watched this movie without reading any synopsis and I was totally blown away. The girl with all the gifts is a fucking awesome movie. A fantastic and interesting take on a classic genre that has been rehashed over the years. To me, TGWATG is like a cross between 28 days later and Lord of the flies.

From the get go, I was saying to myself, "What the fuck is going on?" and I kept asking myself that at least 5 times throughout the movie. I really liked the direction of Colm McCarthy who has been directing TV series so far. The special effects in this movie is not great but that isn't the focus of the movie. The focus is more on the storytelling and acting.

Casting is good. You have Glenn Close who can be scary and a cheebye at times. Gemma Arterton was decent too. I have always enjoyed watching Paddy Considine and I expected nothing less from him in here as well. There is one scene which I would like to mention is the scene which Anamaria Marinca (Dr. Selkirk) and Glen Close are acting. It's one of my favourite scenes in TGWATG. Anamaria was fucking awesome in it. Sennia Nanua as Melanie, started kind of annoying to me at the start of the movie. But it was all part of the plot and I have to admit, as a kid, she acted brilliant and I would love to see future movies from her. A really good upcoming child actor.

Really worth watching it on a weekend when it's out in the cinemas. i will definitely get the Blu ray for this as well. I would highly recommend The girl with all the gifts to fans who love movies like 28 days later.