Wednesday, November 6, 2013
Directed by Clarence Fok
Written by Kam-Yuen Szeto
Cast - Donnie Yen, Andy On, Zhang Hanyu
A cop and his team of comrades go undercover in one of China's most ruthless underworld organizations to stop a gang leader, only to put themselves in great danger after being exposed one by one.
All along I have been witnessing the steady decline of Hong Kong cinema ever since it was integrated into China. I would dare say the last greatest HK movie ever done was the unforgettable Infernal Affairs (which is my favourite Chinese movie). Even that was ruined by making it into a trilogy. Which I steadfastly refuse to acknowledge. Part 2 which was a prequel is ok but definitely not part 3 because it was utter rubbish and it has that useless piece of shit fucktard Leon Lai in it.Fuck him and and Fuck Part 3.
However, after watching Special ID, I pretty much just watched the death of HK cinema. This is by far the worst Chinese movie I have ever watched. I felt cheated. What a waste of time. I wish I had Diarrhea instead of watching this.
From the get go, Special ID turns to immediate shit. First the make up looked fake especially the tattoos and all.Then the acting...My god the acting is just plain horrible. I understand that its a martial arts action movie but COME ON!!! you got to act at least a little man... I now know Donnie Yen can't act for nuts. And then there is Zhang Hanyu, the female lead. This woman's acting is so bad that she makes those china KTV hostesses look like Shakespearean actresses. When she acts fierce, you want to slap her.When she cries,you still want to slap her. And she has that weird hair that either looks like a wig or it really is a wig. And my favourite... the gangsters. When you watch Special ID you will probably think that the gangsters have Tourette's syndrome or they are Bi Polar cause half the fuck time they are either shouting at one moment and the immediate next they are soft spoken. It's ridiculously funny till it becomes irritating halfway through the movie.
Direction is most likely done by an orangutan with Munchausen syndrome. One of the worst direction I have seen in a movie.So haphazard and badly directed that I have seen better direction in porn. Editing was bad also especially those shitty transitions.Camera works were horrible as well. Wrong focuses at times and unnecessary crane shots at the wrong time. Pretty much it's wrong shots at the wrong time. There are some scenes you would wonder what the fuck is going on because all three fuck ups are happening at the same time. Editing,camera work and direction.Bad acting is throughout the movie.At least that was consistent.
That 0.5 only goes to the fight scenes and they were poorly done as well.
Special ID is so fucking bad,you may as well get Tsui Hark to direct and Leon Lai to act in it.
All in all I will not recommend anyone to watch this piece of shit movie in the cinema.Don't waste your money and time.Instead go rent Infernal Affairs Part 1.
And Fuck Leon Lai.
Recommended movies done by the director
Fuck him, Don't bother.
Monday, November 4, 2013
Directed by Alan Taylor
Written by Christopher Yost, Christopher Markus
Cast - Chris Hemsworth, Tom Hiddleston, Anthony Hopkins, Natalie Portman
Faced with an enemy that even Odin and Asgard cannot withstand, Thor must embark on his most perilous and personal journey yet, one that will reunite him with Jane Foster and force him to sacrifice everything to save us all.
I was never a fan of Thor when I was a kid reading comics nor the cartoons as well. Even when the first movie was out,I still wasn't a fan. So no surprises that I will still not be a fan of Thor after watching the second one.
I just wanted to watch Tom Hiddleston as Loki and that was it. Cause the first Thor movie, Loki pretty much stole the show. This time round there were scenes of Loki that were pretty cool. As usual Tom Hiddleston acted well and I guess everyone wants to watch more scenes of him. But to me it wasn't Loki who stole the show this time round. I felt that Christopher Eccleston as Malekith and Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje as Kurse did. Despite the few scenes they had together they had chemistry and their make up and costumes made it even better. Chris Hemsworth was ok even though I'm not a fan of his acting at all. Anthony Hopkins and Rene Russo were pretty much fodder despite their big names.But the worst is none other than Natalie Portman. A block of wood can act better than Portman. Everytime she comes onscreen, it's either I am groaning or yawning. That's how fucking boring she was. I doubt I want to watch her movies anymore.
Editing for Thor was good. The key point for Thor is definitely the special effects, the costume designs(especially the elves) and perhaps locations.I particularly liked the dark world of Svartalfheim where they chose Iceland for its black volcanic landscapes. Script however was kinda boring.The first Thor's script had some funny lines and scenes.In this almost all the jokes fell flat especially that scene in the train.
All in all fans and kids will definitely like Thor:The Dark World and there is probably gonna be a third installation of the Thor franchise and I will probably watch it when I am bored just like I did for the first two.Watch it out of boredom.
Loki: Born to be a king, I ask one thing in return: a front seat to watch Earth burn.
Malekith: Thor, your bravery will not ease your pain. Your family, your world will be extinguished!
Loki: Trust my rage.
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
Directed by James Wan
Written by Chad and Cary Hayes
Cast - Vera Farmiga, Patrick WIlson, Lili Taylor,Ron Livingstone
Paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren work to help a family terrorized by a dark presence in their farmhouse.
Definitely my favourite horror movie in recent years. In fact The Conjuring right now is number 2 (No.1 is The Exorcist). Everything about this movie is near perfect. I got to know about this movie is through word of mouth. And it was getting a lot of positive buzz so I had to watch it. My girlfriend whom I watch movies with all the time abhors horror movie so she told me to fuck off even though I tried lying, telling her it was a family movie (which kinda is if you think about it). So there I was watching the Conjuring Saturday midnight all by my lonesome. Bought myself a packet of Twisties and M&Ms and I was ready to go.
Right at the start, the movie goes all out. From the interview scene to the hideous looking doll, the tension does not let you go. It just fucking grips you from there. And the doll is called Annabelle, if I had a daughter and I saw her carrying that doll... I would beat my daughter up. That's how the scary the doll looked. The actual doll which I looked up is a rag doll and doesn't look scary as the one in the movie.
As the story unfolds,the scares do get more scarier and I have to admit. A grown man like me did get startled on some scenes. Now the good thing about The Conjuring is that all the scare scenes do not use the now traditional way to scare you which is by increasing the volume whenever something happens suddenly which is like shock horror. What these guys did was the old school way of scaring the audience which is psychologically. It just lingers in your brain and you keep thinking about it. To me that's what a good horror movie should be.
Casting for The Conjuring was very good. All five daughters were chosen well for their frightened looks and screams. Ron Livingstone was decent as the dad. I really liked Lili taylor as the mother, her face nicely contorts to Bathesheba's face. And her acting was really good. Bathesheba is acted by the composer of the movie Joseph Bisara. For a music composer, that motherfucker looks evil and you can understand why James Wan asked him to act in this and in his previous movie Insidious as well. If you google for Bisara's picture, you will know why I said he looked evil. Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson have very good chemistry with each other although I didn't quite like WIlson's acting during the exorcism scene, I still think he did a pretty decent job overall.
Direction for the movie was fantastic. You can clearly see the inspiration of 70s and 80s classic horror movies. From The Exorcist, to Amityville, to Salem's Lot and many others were pretty obvious in the Conjuring. Sound and music were perfect. Creepy and yet not too loud and the three songs featured in the movie were good and a little frightening, nothing popular or poppish sounding. The last song was played by the band, Dead Man Bones which is fronted by Ryan Gosling.
But what really made me fall in love with the Conjuring was the camera works. I was awed and truly inspired. The use of steadicam was perfect. That awesome trackshot at the beginning while the Perron family were unpacking was beautiful. All the scary shots were either handheld or steadicam and the nervous movements of the camera fitted well with the tension building in the scene. Also noteworthy was the scene where the camera goes point of view (POV) and looks under the bed and to the door. And that scene where two things were happening at the same time towards the climax. Fucking Brilliant!
The Conjuring is worth every single cent of your ticket money. It is a helluva ride and I will definitely watch it again in the cinemas and buy the blu ray when it comes out.
This my friends... is a must watch.
Ed Warren: We've been called ghost hunters. Paranormal researchers. Wackos.
Lorraine Warren: But we prefer to be known simply as Ed and Lorraine Warren.
April: When the music stops, you'll see him in the mirror standing behind you.
Recommended movies done by the director
Monday, June 24, 2013
Directed by M.Night Shyamalan
Written by Gary Whitta and Will Smith
Cast - Will Smith, Jaden Smith, Zoe Kravitz, Sophie Okonedo
A crash landing leaves Kitai Raige and his father Cypher stranded on Earth, a millennium after events forced humanity's escape. With Cypher injured, Kitai must embark on a perilous journey to signal for help.
The moment I found out that M.Night Shyamalan was directing this movie,I knew in fact everyone knew it was gonna be shit. His last few movies have been shit so why wouldn't this be as well? I would know because I have been watching them in the cinemas grudgingly since unbreakable.All because of a stupid pact,me and my friend made that we would watch all his movies in the cinema with a bucket of KFC chicken. And with every M.Night movies, we were concentrating more on the chicken than the movie itself. So we had no choice but to watch After Earth and as usual we watched it with zero expectations.Surprisingly enough, the movie didn't suck as bad as we thought it usually would.
It wasn't spectacular or anything but just boring. The good parts of the movie were the camera works. There were some really fantastic shots and of course your trademarks M.Night shots which has that shock feel sometimes as well.
Acting wise, its bad. Will Smith had that constipated look throughout the whole film, you wonder what's been up his ass the whole time.The worst is Jaden Smith. That frown he gives through out the movie makes me want to punch his throat repeatedly. That boy is so annoying and he cannot act to save his life.
Script is equally bad and just plain lazy.For a science fiction movie,the plot was dull and unimaginative. Animals evolving to hate humans after just 1000 years is kinda dumb and you will see half hyena and half lion hybrids and a giant bird which is half vulture and half eagle.And that fucking bird scene was just so ridiculous,it made me groan.
It's a good thing that Will Smith was pretty much in charge of the whole movie.From casting to script and direction.He just let M.Night do his usual bit but at a minimum level. Because if After Earth is fully written and directed by M.Night, he would have made the fucking bird as Kitai's father as a plot twist cause that's the kind of stupid shit M.Night pulls.
Don't bother, just wait for cable to watch this.
Cypher Raige: Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. That is near insanity. Do not misunderstand me danger is very real but fear is a choice. We are all telling ourselves a story and that day mine changed.
Recommended movies done by the director
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
Directed by Zack Snyder
Written by David S.Goyer
Cast - Henry Cavill, Kevin Costner, Russell Crowe, Michael Shannon,Diane Lane, Amy Adams
A young itinerant worker is forced to confront his secret extraterrestrial heritage when Earth is invaded by members of his race.
Never been a big fan of Superman comics but I have always enjoyed watching cartoons and certain movies(Reeve) so I wouldn't really know the full details of Superman.What I do know is just the basic stuff like his real name,what his powers are and all that. The last superman movie directed by Bryan Singer titled Superman returns was awful. Also the last movie directed by Zack Snyder was Sucker Punch and that was awful. So I was rather skeptical that Man of Steel would do well. but when I saw the trailers and all,it seemed promising.
Well, after watching Man of Steel, I have to say it does have flaws but its an enjoyable movie for a non Superman fan such as me.
The special effects were pretty cool. I really liked the destruction of metropolis during the fight scenes.It was as though Hulk was fighting instead.Even though the fight scenes were great,it was a tad too long. Superman fights General Zod, Zod takes a break,goes back to the ship rests and then comes back for round 2?
The fathers did a good job acting. Costner did well whenever he was onscreen and Crowe as well.The thing that made me laugh was when Crowe was in control of the ship and he does those funny hand signs to close doors and the walking to one shot to the next.Hilarious.
Michael Shannon did a good job as Zod but he ain't no Terence Stamp.
This is possibly the most boring Louis Lane I've seen. They shouldn't have cast Amy Adams as Louis.However I do like Henry Cavill as the new Superman. He has a fantastic body and I hope he does well in the sequel as well.
Camera works were inconsistent. I hated the abrupt and yet constant zooming. The close up of Superman flying was fucked up. Script was ok nothing great. I fucking hated the church scene especially that shot where you see Jesus behind Superman.That was unnecessary and stupid. Costumes for the Kryptonians were cool even Superman's costume minus the red underwear was nice.
The explanation of why Superman's weakness for Krypton was not bad also. Though I'm not sure if it is in line with the comics. That whole kotex or codex bit which looks like a monkey's skull,I have no clue. Guess you have to ask a hardcore Superman fan whether that bit is part of the comics.
All in all I would recommended to watch it on a weekend. Man of Steel may not be great but it sure beats the last one.
General Zod: [transmission] My name is General Zod. For some time, your world has sheltered one of my citizens. I request that you return this individual to my custody. To Kal-El, I say this: surrender within 24 hours, or watch this world suffer the consequences...
Jor-El: Goodbye, my son. Our hopes and dreams travel with you.
Lara Lor-Van: He will be an outcast. They'll kill him.
Jor-El: How? He'll be a god to them.
Faora: [Beating up Cal-El] You have a sense of morality and we do not. And that gives us an Evolutionary Advantage. And if there's one thing that History teaches us it's that Evolution always wins.
Lois Lane: Welcome to the Planet.
Recommended movies done by the director
Dawn of the Dead